There are a few people who enter our life and make a difference .The person here i am talking about is my Grandmom who is closest to my heart and will always be . She was fondly called Laala by me and my litte brother .The name Laala would sound funny and weird to you, well that did for anyone else who heard me call her by that. It was typical for any child born in a typical south indian hindu family to address his/her grandmother by ajji ,dodda or dodamma . Going by the story what my family had to say how i started calling my grandmom laala was that as a baby i had heard this term LAAla from a girl who did the chores in my house call her grandmom by the same name and hence i christened my grandmom “Laala”.
She was extremely a devout woman,soft spoken charming and a sociable person . Like a typical south Indian she would be clad in sarees and she looked the best when she wore her favourite kanjeevaram saree . I would be astounded by her beauty and only wished that i could admire her the entire day . She infact seemed to me like a hindu goddess with the round bindi and a dozen of bangles adorning her hands and jasmine flowers on her hair neatly pinned up. From the time i can think of ,i remember spending a lot of time with her . Since i was the first entrant into the achar family i was loved and adored by all esp my grandmom . I was indeed the apple of her eye . Any act of mine would bring a smile on her face . The time i got to live with her was then when i got to know her very closely since my father who had a transferrable job would travel places with my mother. So i was left at my laala s place. Being with her i really never much felt the absence of my parents . Those were the days when she would narrate to me the chapters from the epics such as the ramayan and mahabharat and conclude with the Good triumphs over the evil as the moral of the story.
She always indulged in dressing me up and make me look like her little princess .She would make it a point to make my every birthday a special one . Since she was fond of watching Yakshagana(a folk art famous in mangalore) she would take me along with her and i would stay awake with her throughout the night watchin it though it never made any sense to me .The days menu was prepared according to my cravings and desires and the other family members desires dint matter to her much as mine did.Since i loved Gulab Jamun she prepared them very often and i would feast on it like a glutton . Whatever made me happy made her happy .
Laala s routine starts off with her waking up as early as 5 in the morning ,while the suprabatham would be played ,take bath, chant her morning prayers and prepare breakfast and get busy with the household chores . Whenever she got her free time she would read books ,her favouraite pastime .She was a music lover and was trained in playing the harmonium in her younger days. Every evening at around 6 o clock it was customary for the ladies in the house to sing bhajans after lighting the lamp. I would obediently sit beside laala and join her .It was Laala who would get me the shloka books and teach me a few easy shlokas and tell me how important it was to pray and to be god fearing .
I still remember my first play, with me in the lead role, in the 3rd grade . How much i missed my mom and dad more so when i saw all my friends parents seated in the audience who applauded when they saw their daughter perform on stage. But when i saw laala sitting there right in the first row and signing at me to smile all my disappointment vanished in no time. I was always the prime importance in her life . The times when me and my lil brother played naughty pranks on my grandad and he would come chasing after us and we would run like rats and hide behind Laala. Thanks to her for saving the brats from my grandad s wrath . Ah!! those were the days that make me smile.
When we wonder how things can be so fine , it just doesn seem to remain so . The untimely demise of my Uncle and my little cousin shattered laala so much that we never got to see her usual self anymore. She no more socialised .Instead she always stayed inside the closed doors of her room . She was no longer the vivacious laala i knew and many a times i spotted her shedding a tear or two when she got lost in her thoughts of her dear son.But she never ever let things change between us .She still kept showering her unconditional love on me .This at times made me give her more importance than my mother . I remember the summer vacations when i would run to laalas house which irritated my dad who d warn me to stay at home and spend time with him . But nothing stopped me from doing what i loved the most.
When i was in the 5th Grade Laala s health started detoriating . After a few rounds to the clinic with numerous tests one fine day my grandad broke out the news that laala has been diagonised with blood cancer. Though we were all devastated with this discovery the Achar family esp my grandad put up a brave face and pretended that everything was absolutely fine .We concealed this fact even from my beloved laala . We wanted her to spend the little time that she had ,being happy and cheerful . It was unbearable to see her poor condition .And by then she had become miserably weak. It became a routine with me visiting the hospital after school with laala being frequently admitted in the hospital. Even then, I spent maximum time talking to her and giving her company.I used to narrate to her my school stories and keep her laughing ,since she looked the best when she laughed.
The last time she got discharged from the the hospital the doctor said she was recovering, which gaves us all a sigh of relief .
After a few days on the Krishnastami Day ,as it was a public holiday ,the house was in a festive mood. There was a call at about 10:30 am in the morning . I saw my mom s expression change from merry to a grave one . Something dint feel so right to me but i wasn’t told anything .Perhaps my mom herself did not have the slightest idea of what was waiting for us.So we immediately got dressed and rushed to Laala s place . As i reach the gate i see a lot of known and unknown faces but all gloomy faces . As we enter the house i see more and more cheerless relatives and their silent cries tried to convey something when my eyes glanced at them which i couldn’t follow. This expression of theirs was least expected atleast not on a festive day when the whole city was rejoicing the birth of Lord Krishna . Mom and me then rush to laalas room and i see her lie on the bed motionless surrounded by few of my aunts who were crying and sobbing bitterly .
What i see next is my mom s down weeping uncontrollably .I was horrified by the sight of my Laala ,the person who cared about me the most and whom i loved the most has left for her heavenly abode . She had now forever left us and gone .Nothing would bring her back . Though it was agonising for me still i couldn’t shed a tear . Not a single drop of tear .Though i was too small to understand the ways of life ,deep down i knew this day was to come .
In the hindu culture its a customary that women and children are not allowed to witness the last rites of their dear ones . So when laala s body was taken to the cremation site my little brother and i followed the procession.Unfortunately for us, my dad happened to spot the two and rebuked and sent us back . As soon as they went a little further we both quietly followed them . At a distance we stood and watched Laala s body being placed on the funeral pyre and my Uncle performing the final rites by cremating it . We saw her face for one last time . I only wished that wherever her soul was , it should be content and happy with her journey of this life .
Laala is now just a memory in our minds but she l always have a special place in my heart forever . I am grateful for the wonderful mother i have who is just as caring as her and i have learnt this in my growing days . I value her unconditional love shown towards me and making my childhood reminiscences so memorable and for her undying spirit which kept her smiling till the end . I will always look up to her as the most wonderful woman i ever knew.
If your still seeing me, all i want to say is, i love you and miss you
Yours loving
Appi
